Psalms

I recently have been challenged to reread the psalms and really look at them from a fresh perspective.
After reading 5 and 6 I have come to a have a new excitement about poetry in general. There seems to be a partner to David's psalms that I had never caught before. I feel like he makes his requests and declares his faith at the beginning. Then draws back on what he has learned about God's character in order to have a stronger basis of where is faith is at. Then realizing his authority and the truth of the situation he has brought before the Lord he starts to see his part in the whole thing. He repents and declares his unworthiness and accepts the extension of grace; therefore, finishing with a declaration of renewed confidence in who God is and how faithful he is to answer us and save us from our own miserable circumstances.

So in response to this new thought process I have decided to write a poem.

Lord your hand seems to have left me

moved from my life

as I stumble to walk

to crawl

to hold my head up

Deliver me, O Lord, from my own confusion,

your authority and knowledge

be my guide,

my desire

to be lead by your insight

your wisdom

to see this world through your eyes

The agony of those in torment around the world

those that are weeping

struggling to survive

if they could see

see your glory

your undeserved presence

your extension of grace to unworthy vessels

O Lord, let your hand lead me

as you move back and forth around this world

where ever your spirit may call,

I desire to be found faithful,

ready to serve.

Les Miserables by victor Hugg

Here are some random thoughts that I have been thinking about these past two months...
There are several things from Les Miserable that have struck me and helped me to grow.

"Yes, the brutalities of progress are called revolutions when they are over, men recognize that the human race has been harshly treated but that it has moved forward." (pg. 43)

We tend to always pray for God to bring about a revival... isn't that the same as when a society finds itself in the middle of a revolution. Revivals aren't pretty and most of the time the process is not one that people want to go through but just like a revolution it is necessary because it is where you find that you have moved forward in your faith and intimacy with the Lord.

"A wealthy priest is a contradiction. He ought to stay close to the poor. But who can be in continual contact night and day with every distress, every misfortune and privation, without picking up a little of that holy poverty, like the dust of labor? The first proof of charity in a priest, and especially a bishop, is poverty." (Pg. 47)

Can this also be applied to living a life called to missions. Do I make the choice daily to live this way. Do I try to live like the people that I am trying to reach, trying to disciple or do I just grasp onto what is familiar and say that it is so I can be more effective. What does it mean to live this life? To lay aside my plans and pick up a life long project to share the love of Christ to the nations.

"Who knows how easily ambition disguises itself under the name of a calling, possibly in good faith and deceiving itself in sanctimonious confusion." (Pg. 50)

What are my motives for living this way? Are they Godly and pure... or do I find deep within me some ambition disguising itself as a calling. I find myself constantly praying that in every circumstance through out the day my motives can be holy and pleasing to the Lord.

"Her universal tenderness was less an instinct of nature than the result of a strong conviction filtered through life into her heart, slowly dropping into her, thought by thought; for a character, as well as a rock, may have holes worn into it by drops of water. Such marks are ineffable; such formations are indestructible." (pg. 53)

I want so badly to be a loving and caring person. The tendency to be selfish and prideful come so easily. Will there ever be a day when the love of Christ has changed me so much that things come natural. The process is so painful and most mornings I find that I have to clean myself up from the dirt the day before. To admit that I have messed up and have choose not to love is my biggest regret at the end of the day. But o how sweet it truly is to know that my mistakes were forgiven and that each day is a new day. To mess up a little less than the day before could be the greatest goal one could have for their life.

What do you think?

The importance of five minutes...

One of the speakers at this years GO! Conference in colorado challenged us to live our lives in five minute blocks. Each five minutes that we have should be used to make an impact on this world.
It makes sense when it is put up against the way that we tend to live our lives these days. We tend to live our lives focused on these big goals to have money, a career, a "happy" family and in the end none of these things are going to make you happy. You will eventually end up 50 years old and wondering where the last 30 years went.
If we live in the here and now and instead of the then and there we will be able to see the value of our day to day life. The things that are considered boring and manatenis will turn into things that are evidentally life changing.