Intentionally Creative

 Many of you know first hand that I am a pretty passionate person. Whether thats expressed through my many ridiculous obsessions (books, musical instruments, Apple Products, Starbucks, scarf making) or unashamed attempts to cook, bake, sew, or even captivate an audience with my natural charm.


Over the years some have asked how I can so easily and flawlessly be okay with being described by some as ridiculous. Well, it's because I appreciate and embrace my creativity and let those internal promptings ultimately lead me too what I've decided to live my whole life pursuing, God's glory. Sure, sometimes the wires crossed but who doesn't. ;-)


Steve Jobs once said, 

"Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn't really do it, they just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while. That's because they were able to connect experiences they've had and synthesize new things." 

When that creativity is intentionally pointed towards the only person deserving our pursuits, I strongly believe that we can create even more amazing things than Apple. In the bible we are told that we can move mountains, break through the darkness of this world, and shine a light that can change the world by simply asking the Holy Spirit. So, if Steve Jobs can change the way that we look at technology without acknowledging the strength and wisdom from the Holy Spirit, how much more can those that are filled with that Spirit truly do? 

As we all are intentionally creative and asking the Spirit to give us wisdom on how to change this world, we'll start to see a world that God has intentionally filled with children intentionally designed with all kinds of gifts and creative talents. 

"And he has filled him with the Spirit of God, with skill, with intelligence, with knowledge, and with all craftsmanship, to devise artistic designs, to work in gold and silver and bronze" Exodus 35:31-32 

So, I would like to personally challenge you to be intentionally creative with the Lord today. Pick up a pen, a pencil, a hot glue gun, a measuring cup, or even some lipstick and eye shadow to create your masterpiece. Don't settle for someone elses expression of creative, intentionally create with the Lord a life that is painted with all kinds of adventures. It's worth it! 




Living Life Intentionally Creative, 


Brandy 

Glory in the Highest

Glory
If asked what the word Glory makes you think of, would you first think of a song, a film or television show, a ship, a game, an Australian football, a wrestler or even a comic book character? For most of us that hang around in Christian circles the word Glory may bring to mind phrases like "the Glory of the Lord", "show me your Glory", "tell of His Glory among the nations", "for the Heavens are telling of the glory of God." But with all of these different connotations of one word how can one reconcile its true meaning.


Dictionary.com defines this word as followed:

glo·ry

   [glawr-ee, glohr-ee]  Show IPA

noun, plural glo·ries,

1.

very great praise, honor, or distinction bestowed by common consent; renown: to win glory on the field of battle.

2.

something that is a source of honor, fame, or admiration; adistinguished ornament or an object of pride: a sonnet that isone of the glories of English poetry.

3.

adoring praise or worshipful thanksgiving: Give glory to God.

4.

resplendent beauty or magnificence: the glory of autumn.

5.

a state of great splendor, magnificence, or prosperity.

6.

a state of absolute happiness, gratification, contentment,etc.: She was in her glory when her horse won the Derby.

7.

the splendor and bliss of heaven; heaven.

8.

a ring, circle, or surrounding radiance of light represented about the head or the whole figure of a sacred person, as Christ or a saint; a halo, nimbus, or aureole.

verb (used without object), glo·ried, glo·ry·ing,

10.

to exult with triumph; rejoice proudly (usually followed byin): Their father gloried in their success.

interjection

12.

Also, glory be. Glory be to God (used to express surprise,elation, wonder, etc.).

Seems to me that with so many different definitions it's even harder to truly define this world. So when we talk about giving or bringing glory to Christ what does that mean? What does it look like?


The word glory is found 339 times in the bible. From Genesis to Revelation we see a common theme when this word appears, God's glory. Whether that's seeing His glory or bringing Him glory, there's definitely something trying to be communicated to us throughout the bible about His glory. The old testament spoke of people seeing God's glory in the clouds, on the mountain top as a flame, and at several different tents of meeting. Moses prayed that he would be shown God's glory, Aaron was told to wear a tunic to bring glory and beauty, and Joshua begged Achan to not hide his sins from God because it wasn't glorifying.


Later in the old testament we start to see passages that talk about how great our God is:

Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, indeed everything that is in the heavens and the earth; Yours is the dominion, O LORD, and You exalt Yourself as head over all.

1 Chronicles 29:10-12  

This scripture not only depicts how we are encouraged to bring the LORD glory, but so are the stars and animals found in the sea.

The voice of the LORD is upon the waters; The God of glory thunders, The LORD is over many waters.Psalm 29:2-4

Take a look at this video....

Isn't that awesome! There's this overwhelming sense after watching this video to sing How Great Is Our God.


Just thought this was cool... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glory_(optical_phenomenon)




May we all see His glory in everything that we do and live our lives as a reflection of truly understanding how mighty and strong our LORD is. His glory is what Christmas is all about and may we go into this season singing along with all of creation.

Thoughts on Transformation

One really really good blog by one of my favorite artists.

kelly rae: thoughts on transformation: Butterfly ornament clips - Available here. I believe it's a time of transformation but I recognize that unfortunately, I won't wake up o...

Open Your Eyes

Just heard this song on Pandora. You tubed it and this video came up. It's super good.

Reflections

Over the past month I've read several great books but one particular book stands out to me, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown. 


Typically I read books centered around some sort of spiritual development or insight; however, this one was written by a women that has spent most of her professional life studying vulnerability, courage, authenticity, and shame within a university type setting and not really scriptural or theological. What first brought my attention to this book was a speaking engagement that she did for TED I stumbled across on youtube. (Check it out here if you want too http://www.brenebrown.com/welcome.) 


What makes this book so special? Well, this book helped me to realize a few things about myself and I thought I would share them with whoever actually reads this blog. Also this blog was inspired by a women's retreat I just went on focused on how we can spend our days directed towards becoming the women that God desires us to be. As an attempt to practice some of the things that I learned from the book and the retreat, I've broken the remaining parts of this blog up into 4 different sections. An introduction to the book's topic and three main areas she sees as essential to living the life that we were designed to live. I've included some of the things I underlined in the book and a reflection or prayer from that particular subject covered. 


Overview

"Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy- the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light."

I can still hear their laughs, see their stares, and feel their pointing fingers. How is it that memories from 20 years ago can still have such a grip on my emotions, thoughts, actions, and reactions? Is this pain, shame, and brokenness buried under years of self effort and a life spent trying to prove my worthiness to kids that probably have no idea how much I was effect by their actions and/or the God of this universe who seemed to be so far away when all of this was happening to me? Why is that I intellectually know that the only true acknowledgement that I need comes from my Heavenly Father and His love and kindness and yet this self effort and brokenness still rears it's ugly head within me screaming to take control of my life? 




Courage

"Courage sounds great, but we need to talk about how it requires us to let go of what other people think, and for most of us, that's scary. Compassion is something we all want, but are we willing to look at why boundary-setting and saying no is a critical component of compassion? Are we willing to say no, even if we're disappointing someone? Belonging is an essential component of Wholehearted living, but first we have to cultivate self-acceptance-- why is this such a struggle?" 

"I think we've lost touch with the idea that speaking honestly and openly about who we are, about what we're feeling, and about our experiences (good and bad) is the definition of courage. Heroics is often about putting our life on the line. Ordinary courage is about putting our vulnerability on the line." 

"I've learned that playing down the exciting stuff doesn't take the pain away when it doesn't happen. It does, however, minimize the joy when it does happen. It also creates a lot of isolation. Once you've diminished the importance of something, your friends are not likely to call and say, "I'm sorry that didn't work out, I know you were excited about it." 

"Every time we choose courage, we make everyone around us a little better and the world a little braver."

Lord, give me the courage to face my own darkness and live a life that is vulnerable to you and those that you've placed in my path. Help me to be honest when I am disappointed and/or excited about something. I know this type of living will take a lifetime but I choose to start now and trust that you will lead me safely down the path of sanctification. 

Compassion

"Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity. The heart of compassion is really acceptance. The better we are at accepting ourselves and others, the more compassionate we become. It's also impossible to practice compassion from a place of resentment." 

How is that this women has captured your heart for loving others and yet those of us that sit within the church walls each Sunday can't seem to grasp what it means to truly have love and compassion for others the way that she describes? I am so grateful for your truth that brakes through to those that have hearts to understand and hear. I pray that would be able to love the way that you do, that I'd learn to think of myself the way that you do and to think of others the way that you do too. 

 Connection

Just because we're plugged in, doesn't mean we feel seen and heard.

Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we're very reluctant to reach out for help when we need it ourselves. It's as if we've divided the world into "those who offer help" and "those who need help." The truth is that we are both.

Until we can receive with an open heart, we are never really giving with an open heart. When we attach judgement to receiving help, we knowingly or unknowingly attach judgement to giving help.

Umm I'm not sure how she was able to put into words exactly how I feel but she did.... Lord, I pray that I'd really let these words sink in and that I'd start to see ways that I've divided the world into offering help and needing help. Brake down these walls of pride I've built up over the years and help me rebuild walls centered on your truth. 


Conclusion

To practice courage, compassion, and connection is to look at life and the people around us, and say, "I'm all in."

I'm all in! But help me to know what that looks like. Who, where, and how I'm too spend my days. I don't want to go to the left or to the right without first hearing from you. 
Romans 8:26-28

"In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I appreciate it and would love to hear your thoughts. I'm even up for some coffee sometime if were ever in the same city. 


Brandy

Mulling over 1 and 2 Thessalonians

The past couple of mornings I've found myself mulling over 1 and 2 Thessalonians. These short chapters have never stood out to me before but God has a way of making His word alive and relevant at just the right moments in our lives and as we are faithful to ask God to show us Himself through the scriptures He's so faithful!


In order to give a complete picture of just how this book has spoken to me recently I'll help you get caught up on where we are on the journey of the early church. You see the believers living in Thessalonica found themselves under tremendous persecution. We can see the start of their walk with Paul's message of Jesus being their great Saviour by reading Acts 17. As Paul was on his journey he came across the town of Thessalonica, entered into the synagogue and began to preach the good news to the Jews present. Like many of the Jewish people their response was disbelief and defensiveness. We know that Paul spent at least 3 weeks amongst the people and that some of them were persuaded, believed, and joined Paul and Silas. However, Acts also points out that for those that did believe life was not easy right from the start. "But the Jews, becoming jealous and taking along some wicked men from the market place, formed a mob and set the city in an uproar; and attacking the house of Jason, they were seeking to bring them out to the people." (v. 5) 
After what must have been chaos Paul and Silas find themselves fleeing in the middle of the night to a different city which embraced and "received the word with great eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see whether these things were so." (v. 11)


The new believers left in Thessalonica were thrown into a world waiting to see them fail and return to the workings of the Jewish law. With their faith fairly new and a lot of their world views still being centered on the things of old, it is no wonder Paul's letter were so important for them to read and I can only image how refreshing it was to know that Paul, Silas, and Timothy were cheering for them. The truths of God's endless love, gentleness, power and choosing of these men and women kept them going in a season of life that was full of persecution. Biblical scholar, Thomas Klusmeyer referenced this poem by Jane Merchant in his exegesis of 2 Thessalonians;

Full half a hundred times I’ve sobbed,
I can’t go on! I can’t go on!
And yet full half a hundred times
I’ve hushed my sobs, and gone.
My answer, if you ask me how,
May seem presumptuously odd,
But I think that what kept keeping on
When 1 Could not, was God.

Paul's words to the Thessalonians kept their minds focused on what it takes to remain faithful during the battle and how so often it's not our strength or will that can keep us going but the very strength and will of our great Father that draws us forward. I'm under the opinion that it's that same reason that these letters made it through the stages of canonization and still carry such power for today's believes. Like the Thessalonian's, believers today do not always have it easy. There are a lot of daggers being thrown at us as we strive to walk in a manner worthy of our most high King and that's exactly what the purpose of Paul's letters were about, 

"so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory." (v. 12)

So as I continue to read and mull over the letters from Paul to the Thessalonians it's my prayer that I would be able to communicate the same encouraging message Paul does to those that are tired and finding it hard to breath.


"But during our lifetime our Creator and Preserver will lead us to realize that security is not the absence of danger but the presence of God no matter what the danger." Thomas Klusmeyer. 

References

All Scripture references taken from the New American Standard Bible, updated edition

Klusmeyer, Thomas, Exegesis of II Thessalonians 1:3-12, retrieved on October 23, 2011 from http://www.wlsessays.net/files/KlusmeyerThessalonians.pdf

What Happens When I Only Have 2 Classes

I spent most of yesterday cleaning and cooking. For those that know me, this is in itself a miracle; however, it gets worse. The cleaning part wasn't just the normal shuffling of papers and doing laundry, I actually cleaned out my closet and my book shelves. In fact, after a few hours it became obvious that I could no longer easily move to another state with just 2 suitcases, like I did 5 years ago. How have I acquired so much stuff?!?!? I filed several bags full of clothes that I hated wearing but held on too just incase and (happily) a bag of clothes that now are several sizes too big. When I started in on my book collection I realized just how many books I have collected this past year. (Pretty sure I have 6 boxes of books in the storage shed in the backyard that I haven't looked at since moving in with Des and Aaron a year ago.) During small group last weekend we played 2 truths and a lie. One of my truths was that I'd spent over $750 on books bought from Amazon. After yesterday, I am convinced that is a low figure and if I don't get control of this addiction I will most likely out do myself next year. Especially since I have over 600 books on my wish list and added two more last night!

 You see I love reading, even worse than that, I love reading spiritual and personal growth books. While I've been in school these past 3 years my passion and commitment to reading has only grown by adding in business leadership and organization development books. One of the speakers in YWAM challenged us to try to read at least 2 books a month. One book in an area that you love learning about and another in an area you have no clue if you will like it or dislike. I can't say I've done this every month but I sure have tried. It's hard to fit in 2 extra books when you have 4 text books (500-700 pages) to read in 12-18 weeks 4 times a year. This is probably why I've titled this blog "What Happens When I Only Have 2 Classes." In the past 4 weeks I've read 3 books and am about to finish up my 4th. Having 2 classes (one of them math) has given me so much free time at night that I find it easy to stay up until 1 or 2 consumed by a book, much more exciting than trying to keep my eyes open as I study PMBOK theories and practices (project management stuff) or different laws that effect both non-profit and for profit business in Business Law 1 and 2.

So with all this extra time... I have read 2 books by Henri Nouwen and a book by Bill Johnson called Dreaming with God. And I am currently reading a book by Brene Brown on how to deal with my tendency to be a perfectionist. (More to come on this book in a later blog) Dreaming with God was recommended to me a few weeks back at just the right moment by a very influential person in my life. Funny how God uses others to speak directly into a situation that we seem unable to hear Him clearly on. This book has completely transformed my life and given me a passion for what my role is within the Kingdom of God. After graduating high school I thought I had the world figured out. Changing my major three billion times and being put on academic probation for the first time lead to my naive assumptions being dashed to pieces. I had no clue what I wanted to study, let a lone do with my whole life and at 20 years old I thought I had to figure it out.

So I packed my stuff and joined YWAM. After three years of learning how big the world really was and how God wanted me to spend my whole life passionately pursuing Him rather than my own selfish ambitions I decided to head back to school to get an education. Education is huge over seas, especially in middle eastern countries and having a degree can open so many doors for people trying to ministry in this area. At 23 I knew exactly what I wanted to at least study but not how I would practically use that education once achieved. I was good at coordinating and administrating events, loved planning and brainstorming, and can still see how God is using business men and women to spread His glory. Project Management seemed to encompass all of these things and going to Colorado Technical University seemed to just fall into place. Plus, when you add working for WAY-FM, where I was surrounded by men and women that constantly encouraged me and helped me to see what it meant to actually be a business women. (Although, being a receptionist may not have been fort-ay, I learned how to master setting up three way calls and conferences by only hanging up on people over and over again for 4 months. So grateful for grace!) Now after developing business skills and having three years of experiences in the business world, I still see how important it is to have men and women in this sphere of our society influencing others with God's truths.

We need accountants, marketers, IT guys, HR people, Vice-Presidents, COO's, CEO's, and board members that are willing to enter into the darkness and shine the true light. I've been so honored to work alongside the people at WAY-FM because I can honestly say I have seen their hearts to love and follow Jesus no matter what the sacrifice. Each one of them has shown me how exciting life can be when you take risks and trust God to provide and lead you. So, at 26 years old I can't say I know the plan or have figured it out, but I can tell those that are younger not to worry. God's got this. And I have begun to see the value of seeking wisdom and advice from those that have already experienced life in their 20's. We are all in this together and if we take the time to share our lives, our experiences (successes and failures), our hopes and dreams with each other I know for certain God will continue to bless us and allow us to be refined for His glory. We can't hinder truth from advancing and conquering the darkness. So as we live this life it is my prayer that each of us would trust and believe in God's wisdom, strength and ability to place specific dreams and visions on each of our hearts and that we would all relentlessly pursue Him.

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen

Amazed by Grace,
Brandy

You're not just a wondering soul

For week's I've tried to write about how music has made a difference in my life. I work at a radio and hear all kinds of stories of how songs played on the air came on at just the right moment or reminded someone of the truth they desperately needed to hear. In all of my efforts to try to explain how and why music changes people I started to wonder if it meant anything personal to me. Has a song spoke to me right when I needed it to? Has God shown up in the midst of a rift or solo? My answer is doesn't come with profound and elegant words, it's simple yes. Yes, there have been songs over the years that have struck through the dark hours of my life and brought great joy to my heart. There have been others that have reminded me of the simple love, grace, and mercy of our Lord and there have been some that brought tears to my eyes as my soul cried out to relate to the lyrics. I'd like to share a song that just this moment caught my attention. MIKESCHAIR came to our offices at WAY-FM about a year ago and performed for us. It was awesome to see these "normal" guys play songs that talk about the realities of life. They don't shy away from the hurt and the pain that life brings and they have a deep understanding of the depth of our need for a savior that answers all of life's questions. So I ask that you take a few moments to listen to this song, read along to the lyrics, and believe in the great love of our God. You're someone worth dying! You might be the wife, Waiting up at night You might be the man, Struggling to provide Feeling like it's hopeless Maybe you're the son, Who chose a broken road Maybe you're the girl, Thinking you'll end up alone Praying God can you hear me? Oh God are you listening? (Chorus) Am I more than flesh and bone? Am I really something beautiful? Yeah, I wanna believe, I wanna believe that I'm not just some wandering soul That you don't see and you don't know Yeah I wanna believe, Jesus help me believe that I Am someone worth dying for I know you've heard the truth that God has set you free But you think you're the one that grace could never reach Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com So you just keep asking, what everybody's asking Chorus You're worth it, you can't earn it Yeah the Cross has proven That you're sacred and blameless Your life has purpose You are more than flesh and bone Can't you see you're something beautiful Yeah you gotta believe, you gotta believe He wants you to see, He wants you to see That you're not just some wandering soul That can't be seen and can't be known Yeah you gotta believe, you gotta believe that you Are someone worth dying for You're someone worth dying for You're someone worth dying for

Truth Time

I am my worst critic. There are few words to explain how often I find myself judged by my own false concept of what a woman should or should not be like. The image of what I'm suppose to be drives me to self obsessive thoughts and actions. When I'm not judging myself, I'm judging others trying to convince myself that I'm either better than them or need to strive to become more like them.

You may be thinking I'm being to harsh on myself. Well, I'm not sure I am harsh enough. It seems that the bible is clear that I am not to judge others but what about myself. Can one really judge themselves without first judging others?By what standard am I judging? Especially if the conclusion is self destructive or even boastful. Paul clearly states in both Roman's and 1 Corinthian's that judgement will come from the Lord and Him alone.

But you, why do you judge your brother? Or you again, why do you regard your brother with contempt? For we will all stand before the judgement seat of God. For it is written, 'As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me. And every tongue shall give praise to God. So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.

These words bring such conviction to my heart and remind me of Jesus' words in Matthew 7. "Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you." How can I continue with such evil thoughts and practices knowing that I will never measure up to my own standards? And why would I want too? I have nothing to boast in that has not been first granted and gifted to me from my Lord. When I start to see that these arms and legs are blessings from God, my brain, my abilities, and even my "knowledge" come from the one above, I am baffled by my silliness to try to make myself look better to those around me. Why do I spend so much time worried about what others think of me or how I can look better to certain people?

I love Paul's words in 1 Corinthians.

But to me it is a very small thing that I may be examined by you, or by any human court; in fact, I do not even examine myself. For I am conscious of nothing against myself, yet I am not by this acquitted; but the one who examines me is the Lord. Therefore, do not go on passing judgement before the time, but wait until the Lord comes who will both bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men's hearts; and then each man's praise will come to him from God.

In this world people want to see results. Men and women join gyms to get fit and beautiful, business' strive to out do each other and post higher sales records each year, and sadly Christian's pursue the appearance on "holiness" instead of spiritual transformation. But I wonder why it all matters? Why does it matter if I've lost 50 pounds in 2 years or will be finishing my degree in just a few months? Or if I have found the love of my life, or choose to raise my kids a certain way, or read certain authors books..... shouldn't it matter more what God's teaching me, showing me about myself, and how they can best encourage and uplift me to continue to strive towards spiritual growth. So when I confess that I'm my worst critic, it's with the heart wrenching reality that I have a faulty perspective of who Christ says that I am in Him and Him alone.

I'd like to conclude with just a few more words from Paul found in Romans.

Therefore in Christ Jesus I have found reason for boasting in things pertaining to God.

My prayer is that today you would choose to believe these words and find reassurance that the God who judges us all, has given you all that you need to be an amazing you! You are lacking nothing and in everything you have been enriched by the one that has died and rose again for your soul.
Romans Chapter 15

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. And concerning you, my brethren, I myself also am convinced that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able also to admonish one another.

More Love to Thee O Christ

Yesterday's worship service was one of the most inspiring services I've experienced lately. As we sang songs by Chris Tomlin and other modern worship artists, I was blown away by God's greatness. However, it was the words found in Elizabeth Prentiss' hymn that caught my attention most.

More love to Thee, O Christ, more love to Thee!
Hear Thou the prayer I make on bended knee.
This is my earnest plea: More love, O Christ, to Thee;
More love to Thee, more love to Thee!

Once earthly joy I craved, sought peace and rest;
Now Thee alone I seek, give what is best.
This all my prayer shall be: More love, O Christ to Thee;
More love to Thee, more love to Thee!

Let sorrow do its work, come grief or pain;
Sweet are Thy messengers, sweet their refrain,
When they can sing with me: More love, O Christ, to Thee;
More love to Thee, more love to Thee!

Then shall my latest breath whisper Thy praise;
This be the parting cry my heart shall raise;
This still its prayer shall be: More love, O Christ to Thee;
More love to Thee, more love to Thee!

I found it easy to sing along as we praised God for his greatness and his strength, but as I read over these words pleading with our heavenly Father to turn my heart towards him and to give me the ability to love Him more I struggled to sing along. Not because I didn't agree completely with what was being said, but because I was amazed at the conviction and passion that drove the original author. As I've thought over the words this morning, I wanted to know a little bit about the women that wrote this song. So with the help of google here's what I found.

The History Behind the Hymn

Elizabeth Payson Prentiss came from a family steeped in faith. Her father, Edward Payson, was a famous and beloved Congregational minister. Her husband was a Presbyterian minister and seminary professor.

Elizabeth struggled with insomnia and severe headaches for her entire life. After the loss of two children in short succession, Elizabeth’s frail health was nearly broken and she cried out in her distress “Our home is broken up, our lives wrecked, our hopes shattered, our dreams dissolved, I don’t think I can stand living for another moment.” (Peterson, William J. and Ardythe. The Complete Book of Hymns: Inspiring Stories About 600 Hymns and Praise Songs. Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. 2006. page: 348)

May we all have the faith to plead with our Father during tough times to give us the ability and strength to have more love for Him.

Clinging to God in Solitude

For the past couple of days I've been pondering what life has been like after great loss. This past Sunday marked one year after Brian died. Although Brian wasn't a blood brother, he meant the same to me. In my mind I just always had two brothers, Will and Brian. At first there was sorrow, then confusion, anger, and finally acceptance. Now, there are the memories that I cherish and the moments when I just miss him.

Over the past year I've experienced other loses too. There seems to be a handful of loved ones over the past year that have moved on from my life and with their moving I've experienced a similar emotional process; sorrow, confusion, anger, and then finally acceptance. But I've also recognized what Henri Nouwen calls my need to cling to God in my Solitude.

When we enter into solitude to be with God alone, we quickly discover how dependent we are. Without the many distractions of our daily lives, we feel anxious and tense. When nobody speaks to us, calls on us, or needs our help, we start feeling like nobodies. Then we begin wondering whether we are useful, valuable, and significant. Our tendency is to leave this fearful solitude quickly and get busy again to reassure ourselves that we are "somebodies." But that is a temptation, because what makes us somebodies is not other people's responses to us but God's eternal love for us. To claim the truth of ourselves we have to cling to our God in solitude as to the One who makes us who we are.

Although this quote does not speak to the depth of pain one goes through when they have lost someone, it does give us a clear picture of how we can respond. When there is a void in our lives we often find ourselves in circumstances just like Henri Nouwen describes. We don't want to be alone. In fact, we find anyone and anything to help us run away from those moments of Solitude. There's this tendency to become dependent upon people's presences, drugs, alcohol, and even working out, rather than facing our loneliness and recognizing God's presence in the midst of it. There's a Relient K song that over the years has always spoken to me when I'm struggling to believe and trust that clinging to God through these times of almost forced solitude.


It is my prayer that as we all experience times of pain and lose that we turn our eyes to the one that can heal us and fill those empty spots in our hearts. Cling to the words found in Psalms and remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there.

Brandy

Seeing and Praying for the Miraculous

As I continue to pray that the Lord would be my voice and the words that I speak would just be a microphone launching words full of grace and mercy, I am reminded that God can and will do the miraculous. My church is currently reading through the new testament, we just finished Mark and Acts. These two books sparked within me this deep desire to continue to not only trust and believe that Jesus came to earth to demonstrate just how miraculous His strength, wisdom, and understanding really is, but also how we as children walking with the Holy Spirit have been granted that great strength, wisdom, and understanding also.

In Mark we see Jesus as a healer, exorcist, chef/baker, and rabbi. (O and mind reader...) We also see His closest disciples being sent out with authority to cast out demons and anointing many sick people with oil and healing them. (Mark 6:13) Which in Acts we see the disciples (now including Paul) having received great wisdom and understanding in order to preach in front of thousands the gospel of Jesus Christ. How is it that they can speak in tongues, heal the lame and brake out of prison with such little effort.
It's at this point in the disciples story that I hear Christ's words in Mark all over again, "And He was saying to them, 'Do you not yet understand?" (Mark 8:21) In Mark we are given just a taste of the strength of the Holy Spirit. But in Acts we see these disciples functioning and performing great feats because they had received the Holy Spirit and finally understood the purpose of Jesus' blood sacrifice. It's amazing to me that not only do we see the disciples praying and walking in the power of the Holy Spirit, but we also see those that believed their words speaking in tongues and prophesying.

"And I remember the word of the Lord, how He used to say, 'John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.' Therefore if God gave them the same gift as He gave to us also after believing in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I that I could stand in God's way?" (Acts 11:16-17)

These Gentiles repented and desired to lead lives that were sold out for the cause of Christ, because of this they too were granted the ability to see and pray into existence the miraculous. Acts ends with Paul acknowledging that it's not just the disciples and new believers that have been granted the Holy Spirit but we have seen throughout history men and women who have been walking in the power of the Spirit, proclaiming the desires of our most Holy God for all to return to Him and be healed. (Isaiah, Jeremiah, and King David are just a few.)

So how does this connect with my prayers of seeing and praying for the miraculous? It's the whole point and purpose of my prayers. Although Jesus pointed out that this generation just kept looking for a sign to believe in Him and He didn't seem too thrilled by this fact, it didn't stop Him from still revealing Himself in this way. Sometimes I think it's okay to approach the throne of God with requests like the father who's boy was demon possessed, "I do believe; help my unbelief." (Mark 9:24) There are days where my faith in God's ability to break through life's circumstances is smaller than a mustard see. It's that father's statement that helps get me through those tough times.

It is my prayer that as I seek God for the miraculous and continue to pray that the Holy Spirit would be given more authority over different areas of my life that I would see God in great and powerful ways. That I would be aware of not only the obviously miraculous but also the hidden miracles of life like the breath that I just took. Praying that you too would experience God in miraculous ways today.

B

Prayer

When my prayer life becomes self absorbed and repetitive I am drawn back to Paul's words in Philippians.

"And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God." (Phil. 1:9-11)

A lot of times it is hard to keep the perspective that learning what it means to love is pointless without the purpose of bringing Jesus Christ glory. I want to love others and be gracious and merciful, but not so that it brings others warm and fuzzy feelings. No, the purpose of my love for others is to reflect the love that Christ has for them and to ultimately bring Him glory.

It's the same with all of the fruits of the Spirit. I don't have joy or peace in order to make it through this life with a smile on my face, it all boils down to thirsting after the glory of Christ. Longing to see more of Him in my relationships with others, and less of my own selfishness.

When my prayer life has become stagnant and I read these words in Philippians, I wonder if it's because my eyes have lowered to my glory rather than Christ? It's like the purpose of prayer has become fuzzy and I've morphed it into what I think it should be, rather than how God originally designed it.

So, like Paul it is my prayer that we all be challenged today to look at prayer through the lens of God's word and learn what it means to truly love, so we can bring Christ the glory that He deserves.

Brandy

Being Broken

Jesus was broken on the cross. He lived his suffering and death not as an evil to avoid at all costs, but as a mission to embrace. We too are broken. We live with broken bodies, broken hearts, broken minds or broken spirits. We suffer from broken relationships.

How can we live our brokenness? Jesus invites us to embrace our brokenness as he embraced the cross and live it as part of our mission. He asks us not to reject our brokenness as a curse from God that reminds us of our sinfulness but to accept it and put it under God's blessing for our purification and sanctification. Thus our brokenness can become a gateway to new life.

(Reflections from Henri Nouwen's book The Wounded Healer)

What Faith Can Do

A lot of times I crave a life full of adventure and excitement. When I look back at the times when I was consumed with this desire to live a life that was bigger and better than I could ever have imaged, I realize that they were all precurses to a tremendous test of faith from the Lord.

Times like when I became a Christian, when I graduated high school and moved to a Christian camp for a summer, when I left the Christian college I was attending, and when I packed two suitcases and bought a one-way plane ticket to Colorado Springs...

Or when I needed $2500 overnight in order to still go on my missions trip, or flew to Jordan, Nepal, Thailand.... Man, did God show Himself faithful!

Since my time in YWAM I think I have experienced a different type of the faith building process. It's the side of faith that requires us to be steadfast and focused on building our character. In fact, it's the side of faith that takes more than just a hunger to see Christ, but instead a burning desire to become like Christ. To continue to ask the Holy Spirit to dig deep into the depths of my heart, mind and soul to give me the faith to believe that He is in the midst of developing me and refining me.

See my life isn't full of the ups and downs and a lot of unknowns like it used to be. When I start to become discontent I remember that I am where God has me for now and it still requires a tremendous amount of faith to trust that you are hearing and walking with the Lord, when you aren't seeing Him move in miraculous ways.

Please listen to this song and as you do, it is my prayer that you too would remember that your faith can move the mountains and that whether you are packing your bags to move over seas or feeding a new born baby... your faith is precious and God knows exactly where you are at and why.




Brandy

What a sweet reminder

This morning I read through John 15. The first 11 verses seemed to jump off the page at me, every line was alive. Whether it was a reminder of my amazing Lord and Savior, or of how I should be thinking and living my life. Take a read...

John 15

Jesus Is the Vine—Followers Are Branches

1 “I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. 5 I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. 9 Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 11 These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full.

For right now I just want to point out verse 2. I know we want the word Every to not mean what it means; however, I am pretty sure God does not discriminate towards the branches (things, relationships, and desires of my heart) that don't produce the fruit that glorifies His name. No matter what it takes, he extracts it from our lives because He knows the true pain that it will cause to us in the long run. It's this verse that I feel most awe struck by. How painful the extraction is but how much beauty comes with the finished product. Think of the big picture!

So, friends, as you live through this day it is my prayer that you would allow the true vine and My Father the vinedresser, to prune you into a beautiful masterpiece. Know that His love will heal your wounds and will draw you closer to His amazing strength in order to get through the pruning process. Don't try to live this life on your own, trust Him and He will show himself so faithful to you. Thanks for walking this road with me. May we all desire the things that bring Him most glory.

Forgiveness

1 John 1:9

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Recently someone asked me if I had asked for and received forgiveness from God for a specific sin in my life. As I sat there wanting to give her the "Christian" answer I realized that I had not truly forgiven myself for my sin and because of that I was still walking in this mentality that if I could forgive myself then I would be cleansed. That's not what the bible says.... and yet that's how I was and sadly am still trying to stop believing...

You see the truth is, it doesn't matter if I can forgive myself or not, all that matters is that I am walking in the complete understanding of God's word which declares that I am made righteous and forgiven if I confess my sins and believe that Christ died on the cross for that very sin that I am confessing.

Over the weekend I watched C.S. Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia and was once again reminded of just how powerful Jesus' death on the cross was and what a statement He was making by shedding His blood on my behalf.

For if the blood of bulls and goats and the ashes of a heifer, sprinkling the unclean, sanctifies for the purifying of the flesh, how much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without spot to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God? (Hebrews 9:13-14)

I am sure I will continue to have thoughts on this topic but for now...

This is my prayer...

Now may the God of peace who brought up our Lord Jesus from the dead, that great Shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen. (Hebrews 13:20-21)

Okay Lord, Let's talk

C.S. Lewis once wrote, "What I wrote in Surprised by Joy was that ‘before God closed in on me, I was offered what now appears a moment of wholly free choice.’ But I feel my decision was not so important. I was the object rather than the subject in this affair. I was decided upon. I was glad afterwards at the way it came out, but at the moment what I heard was God saying, ‘Put down your gun and we’ll talk.’”

When we finally lay down our guns what do we hear...

My Child,

You may not know me,
but I know everything about you.
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways.
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image.
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring.
Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived.
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation.
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book.
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth
and where you would live.
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb.
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born.
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love.
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child
and I am your Father.
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father.
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love.
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you.
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession.
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul.
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things.
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart,
you will find me.
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you
the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires.
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you
than you could possibly imagine.
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you
in all your troubles.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted,
I am close to you.
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb,
I have carried you close to my heart.
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being.
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,
not against you.
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression
of my love for you.
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love.
Romans 8:31-32

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,
you receive me.
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I'll throw the biggest party
heaven has ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father,
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is…
Will you be my child?
John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you.
Luke 15:11-32

Love, Your Dad
Almighty God

My prayer is that as I walk today I would lay down my guns and step away from the walls around my heart to see the true Love that comes from my Jesus. May we all continue to lift up our eyes to the only one that is worthy of our truest worship and admiration.

B

The Final Interview

This was taken from an interview that Sherwood Eliot Wirt had with C.S. Lewis

The Final Interview of C. S. Lewis
By Sherwood Eliot Wirt

Wirt: Professor Lewis, if you had a young friend with some interest in writing on Christian subjects, how would you advise him to prepare himself?

Lewis: “I would say if a man is going to write on chemistry, he learns chemistry. The same is true of Christianity. But to speak of the craft itself, I would not know how to advise a man how to write. It is a matter of talent and interest. I believe he must be strongly moved if he is to become a writer. Writing is like a ‘lust,’ or like ‘scratching when you itch.’ Writing comes as a result of a very strong impulse, and when it does come, I for one must get it out.”


To read more check out
http://www.cbn.com/special/Narnia/articles/ans_LewisLastInterviewA.aspx

In this moment

Beth Moore once said that when you are going in one direction and life throws you a curve ball you have two options; right or left. You have to choose one. You can't stay on the same path anymore.

This song came on my Pandora at just the right moment.
"Lord, I pray that your words would speak into my heart and give me the wisdom and discernment that I need. I don't want to go to the right or the left unless you are lighting the way before me. Help me to know the difference."

John 14: 5-8

Jesus the Way to the Father

Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”

Philip said, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us....”

Curve balls

So much of life is unpredictable, so why do we try to plan and control "our" lives. My life seems to be full of curve balls, nothing like the curve ball that I received last summer when Brian died, but enough that it has me realizing again how little of life we actually can predict and control.

In Feb. of 2009 I wrote a blog on what the word Sacrifice meant to me as a follower of Christ. http://brandykimes.blogspot.com/2009/02/sacrifice.html


Tonight I was challenged again to mediate on what it meant to sacrifice something. In Genesis 22, we are given a great example of what it looks like to truly lay down anything and everything for the God of the Universe. It's not the greatest example, because Jesus dying on the cross is the ultimate representation of what a sacrifice truly is. However, the journey that Isaac endured and the statement he made to God and the world when he laid his only son on that alter, is a foreshadowing of the sacrifice God was willing to make for us.

So, why bring up sacrifice in a blog that started out about life's curve balls. At the core of what I am struggling with is my own flesh. I have come to realize the depth of my desire to control my own life. In fact, it isn't the stuff in my life or the relationships that need to be placed on the alter but instead it is me. I need to lay my selfish desires to control my own life at the foot of the cross and be willing to sacrifice myself to the Lord regardless of the outcome.

Let's look at the difference between the Genesis passage and the Gospel. Isaac was willing to go through with it but God provided a lamb at the last minute. He didn't know that there would be a lamb, which makes me wonder if there had not been would this speak less of the character and nature of God? And would the story still reveal the same message? Would it still communicate that we are suppose to live in a way that nothing takes a higher place in our hearts that God Himself? Yes, I believe it would. Isn't the Gospel message all about the character and nature of God... and didn't Jesus die. The sacrificing that takes place in both Isaac's life and Jesus' is a statement that declares that all of our lives must be submitted beneath the mercies of the Lord. It is a sacrifice stating that life here on earth means nothing compared to the glory of doing the will of His Father.

That's my prayer. As life seems to be going in so many different directions and I am realizing how little control I really have, I pray that I would sacrifice my selfish desire to do my own will, for the will of the Father.

"Lord, don't give up on me. Don't let me stay the same as I am today, instead help me to learn what it means to be more like you. It is my greatest desire to bring you glory and if that means laying down my life, I will. Please, take away these selfish desires to control so many areas of my life. I don't know what tomorrow will hold and I can't hold onto the things and people of this world."

Reflections on John 14

My goal was to read all the gospels before Easter. Didn't happen. I got through the first three books and up to chapter 10 of John. Today I read to chapter 14 and have come to a deeper understanding of how God works and how he uses time to orchestrate just what His children need to hear and mediate on. Had I read this chapter just because I was trying to finish before Easter I don't think it would have spoken to me so deeply and intentionally.

My week hasn't been hard or frustrating but there has been this desire to know God the way that I used too. To have this underlying passion for the Holy One and to live my life as someone that experiences Him with His fullness. Isn't that was the resurrection opened up to those that believed? Why does it seem like I can go hours, days, or months without experiences Christ's great majesty?

Take some time to mediate on these words found in John and like me, your heart may be softened to His greatness and His Spirit may speak right to the areas in your life that you need Him to the most. I pray that you may experience the true resurrection of Christ and that your heart and soul will be filled with the full knowledge of who He is and how much He loves you. May you be encouraged in your walk and may you once again have the passion and desire for your 1st love. Don't give up on Him because He has not given up on you.

John 14

Jesus Comforts His Disciples

"Do not let your heart be troubled; [a]believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. And you know the way where I am going. Thomas said to Him, "Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?" Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.

Oneness with the Father

"If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; from now on you know Him, and have seen Him. Philip said to Him, "Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us. Jesus said to him, "Have I been so long with you, and yet you have not come to know Me, Philip? He who has seen Me has seen the Father; how can you say, 'Show us the Father'? Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father is in Me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on My own initiative, but the Father abiding in Me does His works. Believe Me that (P)I am in the Father and the Father is in Me; otherwise believe because of the works themselves. Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father. Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it. If you love Me, you will keep My commandments."

Role of the Spirit

"I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. After a little while the world will no longer see Me, but you will see Me; because I live, you will live also. In that day you will know that I am in My Father, and you in Me, and I in you. He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him." Judas (not Iscariot) said to Him, "Lord, what then has happened that You are going to disclose Yourself to us and not to the world?" Jesus answered and said to him, "If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him. He who does not love Me does not keep My words; and the word which you hear is not Mine, but the Father's who sent Me. These things I have spoken to you while abiding with you. But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. You heard that I said to you, 'I go away, and I will come to you ' If you loved Me, you would have rejoiced because I go to the Father, for the Father is greater than I. Now I have told you before it happens, so that when it happens, you may believe. I will not speak much more with you, for the ruler of the world is coming, and he has nothing in Me; but so that the world may know that I love the Father, I do exactly as the Father commanded Me Get up, let us go from here.